Rubbin’s Racing

By: Clint Spencer

Jimmie Johnson, a native of California, picked up his first series win eight seasons ago in April of 2002, his rookie year.  On just his 13th start, the young driver of the #48 would visit victory lane for the first time ever at his home track, Auto Club Speedway, in Fontana California.  This track has always been special Jimmie Johnson and to Hendrick Motorsports, who leads all other teams with nine wins at the two mile track, including Jeff Gordon’s victory during the inaugural race in 1997.  So it was only fitting that Jimmie Johnson, driver of the #48 pick up his 48th career win at a track that has been so special not only to him but the entire Hendrick organization.  Johnson’s win on Sunday tied him with Herb Thomas for 12th on NASCAR’s all time win list

Johnson who was coming off the heels of a disappointing Daytona 500 got a much needed spark to ignite the #48 team and put them back in their mindset to continue their drive for five.  The win almost did not happen for Johnson, who caught a lucky break as a caution went out while completing a pit stop.  Johnson in order to avoid going a lap down had to beat the #31 of Jeff Burton back to the line.  Well, as fate has it, the #48 did exactly that, putting him in the front and in the lead.  Johnson who led a total of 101 laps would go on to lead the final 24 laps as he beat a hard charging Kevin Harvick to the finish line.

Harvick, who finished second, would take over the points lead for the first time in 109 races since he last won at Daytona in 2007.  Jeff Burton, Harvick’s teammate, would go on to finish the race in third.  Clint Bowyer, driver of the #33 for RCR would finish the race in eighth.  Currently, RCR has all three of it cars in the top five in points:  Harvick (1), Bowyer (2) and Burton (5).  Mark Martin, would finish the Auto Club 500 in fourth place, posting his ninth top ten finish at California.  Joey Logano would round out the top five as he brought home his best ever finish at Fontana.

In other race notes, Jamie McMurray, last week’s winner of the Daytona 500 and polesitter for Sunday’s race, finished the Auto Club 500 in 17th place.  McMurray’s teammate, Juan Pablo Montoya, who sat alongside McMurray in second for the start of the race, left the 500 mile event early due to engine problems.  Ryan Newman, driver of the #39, would also fall victim to engine problems.  He would leave California with a 36th place finish. Dale Earnhardt Jr., who started out the season on a high note by finishing second in the Daytona 500, looked like the Junior of old as he finished 32nd in Sunday’s event.

Prediction for the Shelby American GT 350 at Las Vegas Motor Speedway:  We haven’t seen this driver in victory lane since Homestead in 2008.  He won here two years ago and this soon to be father will visit victory lane once again in Sin City,  Look for the driver of the #99, Cousin Carl Edwards, in victory lane this weekend.

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What’s Up with Being A ‘Lil Rusty

By Rusty Stroupe

www.rustystroupe.blogspot.com

January was one of the coldest. Some say it all started when then Vice President Dan Quayle misspelled “potato”. He didn’t actually misspell the word, he incorrectly corrected an elementary chap by suggesting that an “e” should be added on the end. That incident may have brought our lack of spelling efficiency to the forefront of the public eye, but it certainly wasn’t the beginning of the story.

Our family took off on many travel adventures during my childhood. Mile upon country mile in our brown Ford LTD station wagon forced me to concoct methods of entertaining myself. Car Bingo got old quick so one of my favorite pastimes was to read the billboards and ad signs along the road with the goal of recognizing misspellings. There were plenty enough to keep me occupied.

For example, I pointed out a sign once that said something about cheap “gasolene”. I suspect my parents sometimes grew weary of answering all my questions. Understandably so. Most were trivial and senseless. But in this case, my dad came up with a great answer. Said the wise one, “They do that on purpose so you will notice their sign.” Made sense to me.

After all, I do notice a lot of purposeful misspellings even today. Take “Krispy Kreme” for example, where both the words are spelled wrong. Not to be outdone, their rival “Dunkin Donuts” got in on the misspell act long ago.

Throw in the chocolate drink “Quik” and food munchies that call themselves “Snaks.” One local restaurant combines both these misspelled words to get my attention. It must work because I go there about once a week.

I’m not a spokesperson (can’t say spokesman anymore) for any product but worthy of mention in this column are Ultra Brite and Gleem toothpaste, Infiniti automobiles, Liquid Plumr drain unclogger, Cheez Doodles, and various sorts of Lite diet items. Add those to the “texting by sound” phenomenon, and it’s a wonder the younger generation can spell at all anymore.

But alas, all that misspelling is starting to take its toll. Just ask people who misspell stuff when they’re trying to sell it on Ebay, a modern development that’s here to stay. If you misspell, people don’t see your item when they do a search. Ouch.

Some industrious folks go so far as to purposefully misspell an item when they do a search in hopes of finding a bargain. One guy claims he bought for two dollars a box of pocket watch “geers” no one seemed interested in. He spelled “gears” right and reposted it on Ebay and quickly sold them for $200.

I never won a spelling bee in elementary school. You could probably tell that by reading this and any other of my columns. What may surprise you is that I finished second quite often. I don’t know for sure but I think maybe “gasoline” got me a couple times.

But, I’m not too worried about it these days. Spell check is alive and well on my computer and when I butcher the spellings in these columns it is largely on purpose.

All this spelling and misspelling has made me hungry. So sometime soon I will head over to the Quik Snak and git me sum taters. Oh, excuse me, Mr. Quayle, I meant to say tatoes.

What’s Up in Local Sports

By Calvin Hastings

Click To Listen Live

By the time you’re reading this column, most area high school basketball teams have played their first round game in the state basketball playoffs.   Your team may still be alive and if so be sure to support them on Friday or Saturday night.

We want to congratulate conference tournament winners.   In the Southern Piedmont 1A/2A Conference, the Cherryville Ironmen downed Lincolnton 106-74 to capture the boys title.   Thomas Bess led the Ironmen with 32 points.   East Lincoln captured the girls championship with a 53-30 win over North Lincoln.   Lindsay Wright led the Lady Warriors with 19 points.   The Forestview girls captured their 4th straight Big South 3A title with a 77-45 win over Hunter Huss.   Shannon Smith led the Lady Jaguars with 27 points.   Hunter Huss took home the boys championship with an exciting 60-59 win over Forestview.   Princeton Floyd nailed two free throws at the end for the Huskies.   Jihad Wright led Huss with 21 points.   It was the Huskies’ third title in the past four seasons.   Freedom won both the girls and boys South Mountain Athletic Conference championships. The Freedom girls downed Shelby 57-39 while the Freedom boys held on for a 56-54 win over the Burns Bulldogs for the boys championship.

In an unusual development on Monday, East Lincoln’s boys team has forfeited their first round playoff win over East Burke.   The Mustangs reportedly used an ineligible player giving East Burke a 2-0 forfeit win.

Former Kings Mountain softball star, Morgan Childers is still setting records at USC-Upstate.  Childers enters this season as the Spartans all time strikeout leader and is ranked fourth in career wins and shutouts.   Childers has 50 career wins and 16 shutouts at USC-Upstate.

East Gaston senior Aaron Thrams will be heading to Piedmont College in Demorest, Georgia to play basketball.   Thrams is a 6-6 forward and averaged 7.2 points per game for the Warriors and pulled down over five rebounds per game.   Piedmont competes in the Great South Athletic Conference.

Hats off to South Point Red Raider assistant coach Mickey Lineberger.   Lineberger was selected to serve as a North Carolina assistant coach in the 2010 Shrine Bowl of the Carolinas.   Lineberger has been a coach at South Point since 1983, including baseball coach for 22 years and athletic director.   John Lowery of Forest Hills will serve as head coach.   The 74th Shrine Bowl will be played December 18th at Wofford College in Spartanburg, South Carolina.

Former Cleveland County resident Graham Tatters has signed a nine month contract with Tampa Bay of the United Soccer League.   Tatters played at UNC-Charlotte and is a two time UNC-Charlotte team MVP.

Burns High School has a new head girls soccer coach.   He’s Clint Shuford.   Shuford will replace Mickey Morehead who resigned after six seasons posting a 60-48-12 record.   Shuford has served as Burns assistant soccer coach for the past two seasons.

Burns High will be hosting a soccer showcase on Saturday, March 6th.   There will be five matches involving Burns, Shelby, Thomas Jefferson, Polk County, Hickory, Fred T. Foard, Hibriten and Newton Conover.   Matches start at 10:00 AM.   Also at 2:30 there will be an hour long Youth Clinic conducted by area coaches for ages 5-18.   Gate proceeds from the event will benefit the Cleveland/Rutherford Kidney Association.

Gastonia’s Scottie Patton has a Super Bowl Ring!   Patton has been with the Saints the past 10 seasons coordinating all medical care and injury rehabilitation as the club’s head athletic trainer.   Patton even rode on a float through the streets of New Orleans after the Super Bowl win over the Indianapolis Colts.

Congratulations to North Gaston’s Tyler Humphries.  Humphries signed a national letter of intent to play football at Wingate.  Humphries is a wide receiver and ranked second in the Big South 3A Conference with 29 catches for 456 yards.   Wingate was 7-3 last season.

Bessemer City’s Kevin Millwood is expected to be the “Ace” of the Baltimore Orioles pitching staff.   Last season Millwood was 13-10 for the Texas Rangers with a 3.67 earned run average.   In 13 seasons Millwood has 155 wins.  Millwood was traded to the Orioles during the winter baseball meetings.

Shelby’s Felix Soto is heading back to the state 2A/3A wrestling championships for the fourth time.   Soto is the 145 pound South Mountain champion and was second in his class last weekend in the regionals.  Soto is 30-3 on the season.   The championships will be this weekend at the Greensboro Coliseum.

The West Lincoln Rebels won the 2A Western Wrestling regionals.  Taylor Barber is the number one ranked wrestler in his 145 pound class.  The Rebels will send five wrestlers to state competition including Barber, Glen Self, Chad Stamey, Ty Conant and David Sailors.

What’s Up in Hollywood Sports

By Kevin Hastings

Last week we discussed some possible changes to sports and some local teams that could improve their well-being. There was some things left out and we had a whole week to stew on some more solutions to help make our games better.  So this week we’ll do it again.

BASEBALL

Last week we talked about making the baseball regular season shorter than the now 162 games in a year. Expanding on that thought also leads to the expansion of the baseball playoffs.  Make October really be about playoff baseball and not about money and TV prime time start times.  Expansion is the key for baseball and it’s time to bring baseball back to the forefront of our sporting lives.  So what do we do?  Let’s start by adding two more teams to the league.  One, for selfish reason, can be located in Charlotte, NC and the other could be in Portland, Las Vegas, or even back to Montreal.  Point is you need 32 teams to make the divisions work again.  Currently there are 14 teams in the American League playing with a DH and there are 16 teams in the NL playing without a DH. Note:  I would like to change the DH rules but we’ll take one step at a time for now.

After expansion you increase the number of playoff teams in each league to six like the NFL.  You can’t go to eight because you can’t let half the teams in the league into the playoffs.  You don’t want under .500 and mediocre teams in there if you can help it.  Do just like the NFL and let the top two division winners get a bye and the other two host a 1st round playoff game agains the two remaining Wild Card teams.  It’s such a good idea I would say that baseball should call me to thank me, but I kind of stole the idea from the NFL so call them.

POOR TERRELL OWENS

The following is a report I found on ESPN.com about Terrell Owens being as good as Jerry Rice

Headline:  “Owens:  I’m as good as Jerry Rice”

Terrell Owens doesn’t know when to stop talking, and his latest episode has him claiming he’s as good as Jerry Rice, widely considered the best wide receiver in the game’s history.

Owens premise is valid — that having a good quarterback matter — but it’s the tone of the statement that may make it difficult for the 36-year-old to find a team this offseason.

“I know hands-down I’d be close to Jerry Rice’s records if I had been with quality quarterbacks like he had,” Owens said. “He had Joe Montana and he finished with Steve Young. That wasn’t a dropoff. Say I had been with a guy like Tom Brady, Peyton Manning or Drew Brees all of my career.”

Are you kidding me? Not many question your talent, Terrell, but it’s not like Donovan McNabb is a bad quarterback, and you talked your way out of that one.

Now read that report again and look at the headline.  No where in the report does Owens actually say “I’m as good as Jerry Rice.”  No where.  He actually said “I know hands-down I’d be close to Jerry Rice’s records if I had been with quality quarterbacks like he had.”

Owens never said he was as good as Rice yet this is how the media constantly portrays and misrepresents exactly what Terrell says.  I watched this happen in Dallas for three years.  Yes. T.O.’s a little crazy and selfish sometimes, but come on, this is just muckraking at it’s finest.  To the national media:  You can’t say someone said something they didn’t actually say.  Quit putting words in someone else’s mouth to create a story.  One of the main problems with today’s society is that the news media has blurred the lines of reporting the news and making the news.  All of this in order to keep ratings and readership up, not to report to the American public.

NASCAR SPRING CUP SERIES

If NASCAR really wanted to get into the future they would invest in TESLA Motors who just retired the Silicon Valley made electrical sports car.  The roadster could reportedly do 125mph, but I’m sure the good ole NASCAR boys can figure out how to juice those motors up a little. Heck Tim Taylor should have been a NASCAR Crew Chief instead of the Tool man the way Chad Knaus and Hendrick’s get so much extra juice out of their engines.  Taylor would have been the ultimate Crew Chief.  Tesla is a struggling company and looking to get other models into the market.  But, Americans aren’t able and willing to spend over $100,000 on a car.  If we really wanted to bail out the American car companies have NASCAR buy Tesla roadster motors and see how fast the other car manufacturers start producing electric cars.   In 2012 Tesla is coming out with a 4-door sedean that looks like a Porshe mixed with a Camaro and seats 7 people!  Guess what the price is?  Only $49,000 base.  What about the specs?  160,230 or 300 mile range with a 45 minute QuickCharge.  0-60 in 5.6 secons!  If NASCAR doesn’t move quick on the electric motor Indy Car or some other league will and you know how executives hate bad press and protests. They’ll be plenty when NASCAR and the car companies aren’t the ones utilizing the technology while foreign companies are.

While we’re digging at NASCAR I want to address the new NASCAR Hall of Fame in Charlotte.  NASCAR has existed in some form for over 50 years now and we just now got a hall of fame for the sport.  My question is why are we only electing five innagural members into the hall of fame and two of them aren’t drivers?  With all do respect for everything the France family has done over the years for the sport, not one person in the history of NASCAR has watched a race or went to a race to see the France family.  The Frances run the sport and elected themselves into the first hall of fame class is NASCAR history.  Really?  What if Bud Selig would have just built the first hall of fame and wanted to include himself in the first class with only Ruth, Aaron, Mays and Ozzie Smith.  Would anyone be against this?  Of course they would.  Look I’m all for the France’s being in the hall but not in the first class.  Not after years of non-recognition for their accomplishments.  NASCAR please give the honor to the drivers and stop patting yourselves on the back  for creating the sport.  If you want to honor yourself just add more drivers to the innagural induction.  I’m sure David Pearson, Lee Petty, Bobby Allison, and Darrell Waltrip feel like their entitled and I do too!

What’s Up with Thinkin’ Bout It

With Dr. Vince Hefner, Pastor of First Baptist Church, Cherryville

We have all experienced the feeling of fear and helplessness in misplacing or losing something that is important to us. I can’t tell you how many times I have misplaced my keys and began a process of looking for them that would make CSI look like amateurs. I have learned to keep my calm instead of losing my temper as I look for whatever is missing because being angry doesn’t help. To be honest, I don’t know how many times getting angry has helped me with anything! When you give it some thought, it makes no sense to be angry at keys that you can’t find, because it is not their fault they are lost, it is your fault. That’s right, I said it! The only person you can be angry at when you lose your keys is yourself, unless you can blame your wife, kids, or cats for hiding your keys. However, this never works for me because my family has their own keys and the cats never want to drive anywhere, so it is always on me.

When I get my family to help me look for something that I have misplaced, one of them will eventually say, “Where was the last place you left it?” Ah, why didn’t I think of that? If I knew where I left the item, it wouldn’t be lost, now would it? Sarcasm towards the people who are trying to help you works about as much as being angry. It is best to have a spirit of humility when you are asking for help, at least people will be more enthused to help you if they feel pity for your situation.

Last Sunday was Valentine’s Day and I had bought my wife a nice gift and card. I was pleased with my ingenuity in buying her gift without her knowing about it, which by the way is not easy to do. That night I was preaching and for some strange reason I glanced down at my left hand and noticed that something was missing. All my fingers were in place but my wedding ring was missing! Talk about losing your train of thought! I have had this same wedding band for almost 26 years and I never take it off. Well, I did take it off once when Sherry and I were first married. We were in seminary and I had showered before I went to work the second shift at a convenience store outside of Wake Forest. I had never worn rings and I couldn’t get used to wearing something around my finger. My wife came by to visit me at work that evening and asked me why I wasn’t wearing my wedding ring. I can’t exactly remember my answer to her, nor can I remember her response to me, but that was the last day I didn’t wear my wedding ring, up till now. After I finished my sermon I announced to the congregation that I had lost my wedding ring and needed help finding it (before my wife found out!). People looked under the pews, on the pews, and around the pulpit. No wedding ring. Then things got worse. My wife walks into Church and someone tells her I have lost my wedding ring. Believe it or not, she was extremely calm and began to ask me questions to help me remember the last time I could recollect wearing my ring. I had worn it so long that it had become a part of me, but now a part of me was somewhere else!

As important as my wedding ring is to me, there are some things that are more important. I realize that just about anything you have someone can take from you or you can lose it. Jesus talked about the most important possession a man can possess, his soul. Matthew 16:25-26 says, “If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it. And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul?” Today, take the time you need to make sure your soul belongs to Jesus, the only One who can keep it safe for now and all eternity. Remember, don’t give in to sin. Think about it!

Think About It!

What’s Up with The NC Cooperative Extension

By Melinda M. Houser

Extension Agent:  Family and Consumer Sciences

How do we cut down on harmful bacteria in the kitchen? Soap, hot water or a bleach solution are very effective in keeping one’s kitchen safe and clean as possible.

• Wash your hands - before and during cooking, especially after touching raw meat and poultry. The U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) recommends at least 20 seconds in hot, soapy water. How long is that? Try singing “Happy Birthday.”

• Cutting-board cleanup – wash with hot soapy water and spray with bleach solution, or undiluted vinegar. Do not put wood, bamboo, and some composite boards in the dishwasher.

• Sanitize your sink – clean the kitchen sink and faucet handle frequently with a solution of 1 tablespoon bleach per quart of water (the bleach will also kill off some of the microbes in the drain).

•Wash produce – forget buying expensive fruit and vegetable washes. A spray bottle filled with 3 parts water and 1 part white vinegar works just as well to clean smooth-surfaced produce such as apples and pears. Just spray, then rinse under tap water. In our tests, this method removed 98% of surface bacteria. It’s also good practice to wash produce that has inedible rinds and peels, such as melons, because cutting into a contaminated peel can drag pathogens inside. Delicate fruit, like berries, should be thoroughly washed.

• Prevent cross-contamination – one of the most important rules of food safety is to keep raw and cooked foods separate. Never place cooked food on a plate or cutting board that has come into contact with raw food, or vice versa, and wash any utensil (including a thermometer) that comes in contact with raw food before reusing it.

• Put up a barrier – items that come in contact with both raw and cooked food, like scales and platters, should be covered with plastic wrap or aluminum foil to create a protective barrier. Wrap your cutting board with plastic wrap before pounding meat and poultry to limit the spread of bacteria. Wash these items with hot and soapy water.

• Defrost in fridge – defrosting should always be done in the refrigerator, not on the counter at room temperature, where bacteria can multiply readily.

• Reheat rapidly – bring leftover sauces, soups, and gravies to a boil and make sure casseroles reach at least 165 degrees.

• Take your fridge’s temperature – check regularly to ensure that your refrigerator’s temperature is 38°F. Keep in mind that the back of a refrigerator is the coldest. Make sure that raw meat is stored well-wrapped and never on shelves that are above other food.

Caution and prevention are the keys to food safety!

Let’s Talk Bible - Since 1975

By Evangelist  W.C. “Dub” Dellinger

When we become Christians because we have been reborn we hardly ever thank the prophets for their help in getting this to be so.  True grace is the unmerited favors of God, and we get it because He grants us grace through them; writing and telling us about the truth of what they saw and believed it enough to put in writing truths of happenings.  I don’t have to name them.  Just get a good King James Bible, and it will open up to you as your God intended for it to happen.  Now listen to Peter, an apostle of Jesus Christ to the strangers scattered throughout, and he goes on.  You can see that each one took it on himself to work for the Lord, and now when we are reborn we confess to others what He has done for us.  Then our Lord grants us salvation.  If we follow the same path, we will be in heaven with all the saints who did the same.  By that, you don’t have to write a book.  When you see your neighbors in talking, bring them into your church or at least mention something for the Lord.  Watch how much better things go for you if you make it your life.  The writer knows that there are some who need confidence training to speak to just any person.  As some say, you need a college education to talk to all people.  That is just not true.  The writers of the Bible mostly did not equal to a fourth grade education of today.  The main thing is to know what you are talking about.  Some good preachers have no education compared to a college man, and they are granted good results by which they represent.  All they do is out of love.  Pay attention when Christian work is not pushed by love… it soon goes under.  Your Savior won’t have it any other way.  Back to Peter, he had a hard time getting in solid with the Lord.  We could call them pals of today’s standard.  The writer has read where Peter gave his life in preaching the true word of his Lord.

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What’s Up with Revelling In It

By Rebecca Revels

I have said many times that I am not a fan of winter due to the fact that I do not like being cold. James constantly teases me while bringing in armload after armload of wood for the stove. I do not like being cold, but just let it snow. At the first flake, everything changes.

I was among the doubtful Friday when it was in the forecast. James and I drove out to Mooresville right after lunch and every time someone we spoke to asked if we thought it was going to snow the answer was no. We got back home a little after four Friday afternoon. I teasingly told James that if I were going to beat the snow, I had better head for the store. I went about my business getting ready for my weekly grocery buying trip when James came in and told me that it was snowing. Looking outside- and then at the clock- I shook my head, they actually got it right.

James and I went to the store and joined the rest of the state trying to make their way up and down the aisles. I wanted our weekly supply, as it appeared that many of the others were attempting to empty the shelves of the best junkfood items. After managing to squeeze between the throngs of people we took our place in line. Yes, it was obvious that it was snowing when you looked at every open register with lines that were four to six deep. By the time we got to my vehicle snow was covering the parking lot. Loading the groceries James took the cart back and we started home. The roads were not pretty.

We made it without incident from Franklin Square to Lowell. It was all guessing and memory as to where the lanes of travel were. We started out of Lowell and around Spencer Mountain. Just before we reached the park we saw blue lights up ahead. We turned around, but then the police cruiser passed us. Before us was a steep hill that was getting icy that had vehicles stopped at various places. Turning back we decided to try and follow our original route. There were vehicles of various makes and models stopped all along our route. A car in front of us was traveling at the speed of approximately five miles per hour. As we made our way home we passed a place were a car had gone over an embankment on one side and a truck on the other. I was becoming seriously concerned.

There have been a few times that I have been very glad to see home, and this was one of them. By the time I pulled into the driveway I was exhausted.

Then came Saturday morning. Looking out the window the view took my breath; it was beautiful. By the time I was ready to go outside I looked like one of those comic strip kids. But with camera in hand I was headed for the woods.

Truth be told, there is nothing like walking in the woods, walking in a wholly natural setting that is blanketed in snow. The only sounds are the song of the birds and the crunch of the snow underfoot. I never felt the cold as I walked. I trekked around my dad’s big fishing puddle, and across my brother’s deer field. Then I did something I rarely do, I altered my path. Instead of going my usual route, I headed for the creek. Following this small stream through the woods I watched the water cutting a path through the snow. I spotted dozens of deer tracks and the tracks of other varmints. Not wanting to risk trying to cross the swampy area where the creek spreads I made my way up a hill that is difficult under the best conditions.

Exiting the woods onto the powerline the sunlight glittered like diamonds off the snow covered trees and brush. A brilliant blue sky and bright sunlight greeted me. Taking my time I made my way back up the dirt road toward home.

Inside, with snow covered boots removed, coat hung over a chair to dry I got my cup of coffee and found my seat beside the woodstove to thaw. Even after over an hour wandering around and through the woods, having snow fall from the trees and inside my coat, I wasn’t really all that cold. I guess, that snow, just brings out the kid that resides in all of us.

What’s Up with The Right Slant

By Anthony W. Hager

Email: tony_hager@therightslant.com

Web: www.therightslant.com  /  Blog: http://anthonywhager.blogspot.com/

If discussing politics and religion should be avoided at all costs, then science must join the list. Much of today’s “settled science” or “scientific consensus” is actually religion in its purest sense. The scientific faithful are proselytizing, pronouncing woe to anyone who questions their doctrine.

Too many scientists are High Priests in the First Assembled Reformation Church of Environmentalism, or FARCE for short. They and their followers defend their god–the environment–with the same zeal that  Muslims defend Mohammad.

Actually, to grant FARCE church status is a bit kind; it is a cult. Non-believers can have rational discussions with Christians, Jews, Mormons, etc. The same holds for most Muslims, too. Avoid the Al-Qaeda/Hezbollah sect and you’ll be fine. But you can’t have a sensible debate with a cult follower. Fact, history, precedent, logic, common sense; none of it matters to the cultist. Therefore, it doesn’t matter to the FARCE member.

If you question a FARCE tenet, even to the slightest degree, you’re a heretic. Publicly denounce FARCE’s core belief–that mankind drives cataclysmic climate change–and you’re a global warming denier. Blind obedience, without the slightest hint of individual thought or reason, is required.

For example, the FARCE has declared that flat screen televisions are an environmental hazard. If you have one you’re destroying the planet. Use a light bulb that hasn’t been blessed by a FARCE priest and you’re chief among sinners. And you don’t want to contemplate your eternal destination if you drive an automobile that’s not on the FARCE list of doctrinally acceptable vehicles.

A quality common to cults is the demand for absolute compliance. Within faiths and religions you’ll find divergent opinions. These become denominations. Denominations will hold to basic principles even while disagreeing about specific doctrines. Not so with cults.

Environmentalists allow no disagreement. The “green” activist will ignore any evidence or argument that contradicts their belief system. Dissent is intolerable, even sacrilege, and ignored as if it never existed. And no, I’m not exaggerating. Let’s look at the evidence.

At the 2008 UN global warming conference in Poland over 650 scientists questioned the accuracy of man-made global warming science. The Petition Project–instituted by Frederick Seitz, past president of the National Academy of Sciences–has collected over 30,000 signatures from qualified professionals questioning man’s impact on climate.

The FARCE will not tolerate such heretics. Apostate scientists have their character assassinated, their voice silenced and their scientific credentials dismissed out of hand. In short, they’re excommunicated from the FARCE, which is the climate change community.

A little common sense will land you in hot water, too.

In California, regulators have proposed banning wood burning stoves and fireplaces. Wood smoke and soot, apparently, are health hazards and environmental contaminants. But unless I’m mistaken, wildfires burn California to the ground every other year and man has burned wood for about 1.5 million years. Let’s take the matter of fire a little farther. The Indians—whom the FARCE considers to have been at one with the earth—burned wood.

You’ll waste your time confronting a FARCE disciple with this argument.  The “green” apostle will simply charge you with wanting to destroy the earth. End of discussion. They’ll never explain where you will live if you succeed in destroying the earth. Doesn’t matter. Their doctrine is unquestionable.

Other topics are verboten within the FARCE, too. Scientists have skewed global warming data and conspired to conceal the process. The IPCC’s report on the disappearing Himalayan glaciers is decidedly flawed. Temperature monitoring data is manipulated to indicate warming trends. So what? Facts are lies within the FARCE.

Nothing is valid that doesn’t fit the environmental creed. Only the canon is real. Global warming exists, earth is doomed and heretics will be sacrificed on the nearest FARCE altar. Sound like a witch hunt? Cotton Mather couldn’t do it so well.